What if, when
by kwayland
Summary: I wish circumstances were different. Cas said that once to Dean, but what if they were? What if they'd met in a store and Dean wasn't hunting. He was living a normal apple pie life. But what if Cas was still an angel and remembered Dean from an alternate universe...was Rated M for future maybe and some language. I'll let you know when that changes...just seemed unnecessary for now
1. Chapter 1

*So I know I just started writing a Klaroline fanfic and I should update that more often but I saw this post on tumblr and had had had to write a story about it. I realize it's also not in the same fandoms I usually post about so I'll understand if my regulars don't read it. I just hope somebody does. :)

_"I wish circumstances were different."_

Dean strolled into the store, fingering a list of items to buy in his pocket. Lisa figured he might as well do something, ever since he quit his job as an accountant, "to do something more meaningful with his life." He started in the produce section picking up some apples and bananas before passing through the bakery aisle to get to the dairy. He didn't quite make it through however, when he noticed a small tray with little cups of something delicious.

Inside those cups, next to a plethora of scattered forks were small bite size pieces of berry pie. Dean grabbed two, glancing around to see if anybody noticed before he did, and downed them in two massive bites.

He careened into the dairy aisle, wanting to get out of the store as soon as possible and ran directly into another quickly moving body. The motion propelled him backwards and he brushed his chest down, almost symbolically removing the embarrassment.

"Watch where the hell you're going!"  
"I am sorry," a flustered voice responded. "I did not predict you coming around the corner. Truly, I am sorry." Blue eyes met green and Dean couldn't find it in him to keep berating the guy. He didn't even have the heart to tell the guy to step back even though he was awfully close. Inches away, in fact.

"That's alright," he said, slapping the guy on the shoulder. The guy looked strangely confused for a few moments before composing his face and smiling tight-lipped. He didn't shift his eyes ever from Dean's and Dean felt heat rising in his body and an odd desire to fan himself.

"I'm Dean," Dean said to ease the tension.

"I'm Cas."

"Interesting. What's that short for?"  
"Why...how...why would that be short for something?" Cas bumbled.

"No reason I guess. What brought you to the grocery store?"

"I am," Cas glanced down at the box of Goldfish in his hands, "I am...I don't really know. I am on a mission, but I have no desire to complete it."

Dean would've normally moved on from conversing at this point, but this man had the most curious responses to his questions that Dean became more and more interested in what this man had to say. And then it hit him. This guy reminded him of someone, maybe they had even met before.

"Do I know you?"

"No," Cas responded without hesitation but almost too quickly. And too firm.

"What kind of mission?"

"I cannot say."

"God you're more complicated than that Bella Swan chick. And nothing she did or said ever made sense."

"I do not understand that reference."

Dean smiled. "It's just some stupid teenage book. I really wouldn't bother."

Cas smiled, and glanced down at his hands. Dean thought he looked like a tiny child in an oversized trench coat, but in an absolutely adorable way. Dean couldn't remember a time in his life he ever swayed this way, but this was a guy he didn't want to lose contact with. And he got the sense that Cas felt the same way, strangely enough.

"Well, I have to run," Dean said, sounding like every character ever in a romantic comedy, and yes he did watch some of those not that he would ever tell anybody, in fact he would deny it, who had no desire to not talk to this person for the remainder of the day.

"It was very nice meeting you, Dean," Cas smiled, stretching out his hand. Dean slapped and grasped and felt a shock wave up his arm. At first he thought it was from the harsh contact of flesh, but the tingling didn't go away. It was a tingling that he wanted to feel across his entire body. Dean abruptly let go, terrified of what that meant and blurted, "What's your phone number? I mean...you know...it might be nice to catch up sometime," Dean recovered as best he could.

But Cas just grinned knowingly to himself, completely aware of what was happening to Dean at that very moment. He knew because he knew Dean. He knew because this was the chance he'd always been waiting for. He pulled a pen from his trench coat pocket. "Your arm." Dean obliged without question and Cas scribbled down a phone number on his forearm.

Dean didn't know what to say and so he just walked away. He practically slammed his head into wall afterwards, when thinking about the encounter because it wasn't like him to walk away from a challenge. But an emotional challenge, maybe so.

Throughout the day he kept glancing down at the phone number, like it was an itch he was unable to scratch. Lisa soon noticed and jumped up and down excitedly as any sister, adopted or not, would when a phone number appeared on a brother's arm. She asked who she was, what she had been wearing, where they'd met. Dean hadn't been able to respond, not ready to say the undeniable truth. That this was the phone number of a man. A ruggedly handsome man he'd met in the store and had felt tingles over, like he was some young, romantic school girl, which he wasn't anywhere near that as far as he was concerned. He walked into the living room to find Sam polishing one of the many guns they owned for when the hunting season came around.

"The deer are almost in season."

"I know. Dude, you missed a spot there," Dean pointed out.

Sam shoved Dean playfully and rubbed it spotless. He felt Dean's uncertainty flowing off him in waves but knew asking was practically futile. Not that that had ever stopped him before.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Dean, come on man. I'm not stupid."

"Let it go, Sam."

"Alright."

Dean slid open his phone and stared through all the contacts of women who he barely knew. They were just a list of fuck-buddies that had worn down to a bunch of women he just wanted to have a quick five minute hook up with and not even look at their faces. They irritated him that much. He inputed Cas' number into his phone and considered texting or calling it but refrained. Sam watched Dean carefully and noticed that new contact addition by the name of Cas.

"Who's Cas?"

"Cassandra," Dean replied. "She looked like fun. Hot ass in those jeans, man." Dean acted like whatever he was making up and not visualizing was the sweetest thing he'd ever seen. Sam bought it and backed off. That was, until Cas called, but Dean hadn't remembered giving Cas his number.

"Better pick that up. She's probably feeling lonely."

"Shut up."

"Hello?" Dean answered, strolling away from Sam and into his bedroom where he shut the door. Lisa observed his actions and approached Sam.

"That's not normal Dean behavior."

"I think this girl might have actually meant something to him."

"Mind equals blown," Lisa whispered.

"Dean," Cas said over the phone, in the sam gristly voice. "I wanted to make sure this number was working."

"How'd you get it anyways?"

"I looked you up in the phone book and pretended to be a pizza delivery service and asked for you cell number. Some girl answered the phone."

"That would be Lisa."

"Lisa? You are with Lisa?" Cas asked, anxiety obviously thickening his voice.

"I guess...she's my adopted sister."

"Oh. Right. Well, um, that would be all I suppose."

Dean took a deep breath and gathered strength from the memory of Cas's hand brushing against his arm deliciously gently while writing down his number. "I'm glad I met you."

"And I you, Dean." And he hung up. Apparently this guy wasn't very good at goodbyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean hadn't heard from Cas since the day they'd met and he was much too unsure to call him himself. Sam and Lisa wouldn't leave him alone about his new "girlfriend" so much so that Dean had hidden in his room, pretending to design a new car he wanted to build. But, in reality, he was just blasting Led Zeppelin and staring at a blank sheet of paper, twiddling a pencil between his fingers.

A knock shook the door and Dean paused "Thank You" and started flipping through his one and only car magazine for "inspiration."

"Dean," Sam said, peering into the room. "Lisa went to Five Guys this afternoon. We have your favorite burger. It's in the kitchen."

"You just want me to come out of my cave."

"True. But it is a burger."

"I'll be there in a sec." Sam shut the door behind him and Dean got up, seriously disgruntled, and just focused on how incredible his burger would taste, and ambled towards the kitchen.

He didn't say anything as he collapsed on the bar stool and dug into the burger, taking a huge bite he could barely get his mouth around.

"Dean, we're worried about you," Lisa said.

"What is this? An intervention?"

"Maybe," Sam stated matter of factly.

"Who is this girl, Dean?" Lisa asked.

"It doesn't matter. She hasn't called in a while."

"You liked her," Lisa smiled.

"Fine. I did. Can we stop talking about it now? I feel like you guys are about break out the ice cream and Nicholas Sparks movies."

"Would that make a difference?"

"No!" Dean yelled.

"Alright. Alright." Sam replied. Lisa just looked sad, like Dean was an abandoned puppy.

"What?" Dean asked.

"You've been shut in that room for the last three days. You aren't cracking jokes or lathering everything you say in sarcasm. You won't even smile, which isn't fair because I love your smile."

I grinned fakely midway through a bite and Lisa laughed. "Now that's more like it."

Dean grimaced and asked Sam to fetch him a beer. Sam got one without question and flipped the lid off. Dean took a swig and grotesquely wiped his mouth on his sleeve.

"I'm gonna head out," Dean declared.

"Where to?"

"Don't know. Not here." And he picked up a leather jacket in a shade of brown and walked out the door.

He absentmindedly wandered the streets, paying little attention to where he was going. He was blissfully blank until a child of around ten ran up and picked his back pocket. Dean almost didn't notice but just in time he wrapped his arms around the flailing kid and turned him around. He ripped his wallet out of the boy's grubby hands and pulled out five bucks, tossing it to the ground.

"For your inconvenience," Dean seethed. He turned his back only to hear a gun click into place. He raised his arms and slowly reverted back to the boy.

"Woah, hey. You don't want to do that. Too young to spend the rest of your life in jail. What's your name?"

"Dylan," the child responded uncertainly.

"I'm Dean. Why don't you give me the gun? Nice and slow. That's right."

But it was a feint. Dylan had obviously done this sort of thing before. He turned feral and Dean heard a bang and dove to the ground in a desperate hope of avoiding the bullet. He was midair and the bullet was seconds from piercing his flesh when a trench coat whizzed in front and took the shot. Dean scrambled up, wrenched the gun from the kid's trembling fingers and shooed him away. He then ran over to the body slumped on the ground to see it was Cas. The one who had mysteriously disappeared then reappeared.

"Are you hurt?" Dean cried, unsure of what to think, so many thoughts were buzzing through his head.

"No," Cas groaned. "He missed."

Dean would've sworn the bullet was nowhere near missing, but he was just glad his one-shopping-market-stand was still alive. Dean grabbed on to Cas' arm and helped him up. At that moment two thoughts raced through Dean's head. One, he was majorly pissed and two, this guy just saved his life. But rage won out.

"Where've you been? And why were you here?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I met you, I thought we had a mutual friendship beginning and then you just disappeared. And then right when I was in danger you were there just in time. That can't be coincidence."

Cas appeared confused for a few seconds before collecting himself. He'd just been hunting some demons with Dean but it hadn't been this Dean. "I was helping a friend. And I was walking to the bakery just down the street when I saw you. You could've called."

"That's not the point and you know it."

"I am sorry, Dean. I didn't know it would matter so much to you."

"Of course you didn't know. You don't know me because you haven't taken the time to."

"Right."

"What does that even mean?" Dean huffed and walked away towards home. At least he was pretty sure that's where he was heading.

"It's faster if you go that way," Cas whispered.

"What. So you're a stalker now too?"

"Of course not. I have a good memory."

Dean stomped away in the direction Cas pointed and didn't look back. His phone buzzed and he glanced down to see a text message from Cas. Fuck his stupid pizza man prank call. Dean completely ignored it for a total of one minute before he couldn't resist the temptation. He opened the message to see the words:

_Give me a second chance._

With the letters capitalized and a period at the end of the sentence and everything. Did this guy ever relax and kid around?

When he arrived home he texted Cas back.

_OK_

And on the front porch were some old cassette tapes and a large piece of pie from the bakery down the street where he'd been practically robbed. Dean approached the pie to see that it was a lemon meringue with the words, "I'll do better," written in chocolate. Dean had no idea what that meant of whether it matter to him either way. Because even though Cas somehow new he liked old-school rock music and pie and already knew where his house was. And even though he acted awkwardly half the time like he already knew everything about him, which creeped Dean out massively, he'd as good as promised Cas a second chance. And promises meant something to Dean.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean strolled into the house toting the pie and cassette tapes and flung them down on the counter. He fetched a fork from the drawer beside the sink and stabbed it down into the pie, before shoving it in his mouth. He munched down on it when Sam and Lisa came in and stared down at the piece of pie questioningly.

"It was on the doorstep," Dean grumbled past the food.

They said nothing and sat down on the barstools. Dean studiously ignored them and continued to chow down on his pie. When he finished he kept his eyes on his plate while he mumbled, "Have you ever met someone who seems to know everything about you without knowing anything about you at all?"

Lisa and Sam shook their heads simultaneously.

"Well does it seem strange to you?"

They nodded. "I think," Sam said. "I'm not even sure what you mean."

"I don't either."

"So when are you seeing her again?"

"How do you know I did?"

"Pie did magically appear on our front door."

Dean grimaced and shrugged. "We haven't worked that out yet. It's pretty low key."

"Sure it is," Lisa smiled.

"You two are unshakeable!" Dean groaned. "Maybe I'll go call him...I mean her..." he recovered quickly making him and I slur into one almost incomprehensible word. Unfortunately, they'd both been a part of his life for what seemed like forever.

"Him!" Lisa shouted. "I knew it."

"How would you know something like that?" Dean countered.

"Oh come on, Dean. You've never been in a serious relationship with a girl. There had to be something wrong."

"What's going on?" Sam asked, not understanding what was going on. There wasn't any doubt in his mind that Dean was as straight as they come.

"Dean's gay," Lisa said casually. "And this woman is actually a man."

"Wait, what?" Sam shouted, getting unnecessarily riled up. "How is that even possible?"

"It's something you're born with, dumbass," Lisa rolled her eyes. "So what's his name?"

"Cas," Dean conceded.

"Is he attractive?"

Dean was not in any way comfortable talking in such a carefree manner. He hadn't even been sure he was actually gay until Lisa had spouted it as a simple well-known fact. "Um...sure. I guess so."

"Details Dean. We're all on the same page now. It doesn't need to be uncomfortable. It's who you are."

"Doesn't feel like it."

Sam hadn't uttered a word in what felt like minutes to Dean. He was immensely worried about what Sam thought because it mattered to him whether or not Sam approved.

Eventually Sam gathered himself with a deep breath and said, "Dean. I never would've imagined this is what you were, but I'm alright with it. Hell, I'm happy for you."

Dean smiled and stared at both of his siblings with unimaginable love, not that he would ever utter the words. He shouldn't have worried about it in the first place. He should've known.

"I met him in the supermarket," he began cautiously, attempting to answer Lisa's question, "I automatically felt a spark which I didn't understand at the time but I ended up asking for his number. He's got this semi-wavy, semi-straight deep brown hair, blue eyes, and a pleasant smile. I don't know. I think he's attractive."

"That's all that matters," Lisa responded. "Gosh," she gushed, "When do we get to meet him?"

"Um...never. This conversation is becoming too domestic for me. Excuse me."

"Dean come on," Sam called at his retreating back.

"I don't even know what's going to happen, you guys. Leave it be."

He stole into his room and shut the door carefully behind him, shutting it with both of his hands poised to catch it just in case of a fluke. He flung himself on his bed and glanced over to his phone on the bedside table. He wanted to call him but had no idea what he would say. _Come on, Dean. You're not a pussy._

Dean punched in the number and pressed the green telephone button. There were a couple rings, and Dean thought he was about to get lucky, chicken out, when Cas picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Cas. It's Dean."

"Dean! I am so glad to hear from you, you have no idea."

Dean couldn't quite catch the smile that escaped from his usually controllable emotions. At least that was until he heard Cas breathing heavily. Much too so.

"Are you alright?"

"Oh, yes. I just got in a situation, but I'm fine now," Cas sighed. Dean couldn't help getting the feeling that Cas was majorly depressed besides his outgoing demeanor.

"Cas. Come on, man."

"It's just a friend. He just disappeared. It's a common occurrence frankly, but I always get scared for him."

"A him?"

"Don't get jealous, Dean. There is absolute no reason for you to be so. It would even be laughable." And Cas laughed, a sound Dean wasn't even sure 99.9% of the population of this earth had ever heard.

"Fine," Dean grumbled.

"What can I do for you?"

"Nothing. I just wanted someone to talk to who wasn't my crazy, slightly delusional, and overbearing family."

"They are not as bad as that, Dean. They are just looking out for you."

"Yeah, whatever. So, watcha doing?"

"I believe it's pronounced as what are, and I am currently searching for my friend."

"What happened to him?"

"A guy name Crowley whisked him away, probably as bait for me. He has wanted to talk to me for quite some time and I've been...uncooperative."

"Jesus! What world do you live in? What a son of a bitch."

Dean could've sworn Cas was smiling as he said, "A world not too different from your own."

"Okay, well never take me to that part of town. I'm okay without it."

"I won't. But I think you would be fine. You would handle it quite well in fact, I'm sure of it."

Dean got the creepy crawly sensation again that Cas knew more about him than anyone on this planet. Dean was trying to find the words to ask Cas about this sensation when Cas said something about needing both hands, goodbye, and I will see you soon, before hanging up. Dean groaned into the telephone and slammed his hand against his desk. He knew Cas had been telling him the truth, but Dean wished he could have the whole truth. The truth about the pie and the cassette tapes and the fact that this afternoon he'd went to check on his rusty, broken Impala that he hadn't had time to fix because he was fixing other people's cars, absolutely spotless with no dents and clean seats. It was all beyond weird, and Dean had had enough. Cas was going to have to spill.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean called a couple of hours after their previous conversation, hoping Cas was done looking for his friend and ready to tell him everything. Dean wasn't going to give up and let Cas off easy this time.

Sure enough Cas picked up. "Dean. It's not a good time. Could I call you back?" he whispered.

"No. I have some questions for you."

Cas said nothing in reply and Dean could hear a voice in the background asking Cas who he was talking to. Cas completely ignored the voice, which kept coming closer and closer until Dean recognized the voice. And it wasn't someone he knew well or someone he met by chance a couple of times. It was him. His voice.

Other, fake Dean said, "Cas? Seriously man, who are you talking to? I really need you to patch me up. I can't even feel my left arm."

"A friend."

"Oh yeah? Naomi?"

"No, of course not. That would be ridiculous. Do you think I like being controlled?" he said away from the phone. "I'm really sorry but I'm going to have to call you back," Cas said into the phone before he realized that it was just a monotonous buzz. Dean had already hung up.

Dean couldn't concentrate on anything. Not his car magazine or the bills he was supposed to have paid in a couple of days. He couldn't even muster up the energy to wipe away the remaining smudges of a number on his forearm. He didn't understand how having a conversation with him while he was sitting right here, nowhere near Cas, was even possible. At first, he thought it was a voice recording of him and that Cas was really a stalker but the words other Dean was saying were not anything Dean had said in his entire life. Which logically, but impossibly, meant there was another one of him. It would explain how Cas knew so much about him but it made no sense. He was in way too far over his head. Dean hopped into the shower, scrubbed at the phone number until his arm was clear of any dark splotches and just let the water run down his hair, over his face, and down the drain for over thirty minutes. He didn't wash his hair, or even clear the water from his eyes with the back of his hand.

"Dean," Sam knocked on the bathroom door. "Dude, you've been showering for like forty-five minutes. The water can't possibly even be warm anymore. What are you doing?"

"Go away, Sam," Dean murmured.

"Dean..."

"Now!"

"Dean, goddammit, I'm not going anywhere until you get out of that fucking shower and watch t.v., or fix a car, or do the dishes. Something normal."

Dean shoved the spout down, ending the steady stream of water, wrapped a towel around his waist, and stomped out of the bathroom leaving large misshapen footsteps all across the floor.

"Are you going to clean that up?" Sam asked, frustrated.

Dean said nothing, dried off, and threw on a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt. "I'm gonna go for a run. Is that normal enough for you?"

"I guess...but Dean you don't never wear sweatpants running you always wear..." And Sam heard the front door slam close. Lisa peeked into Dean's room wear Sam was still standing flabbergasted and gave Sam a hug.

"What happened?"

"I don't even know. Hopefully when he gets back he'll have returned to normal."

"Maybe this is the new Dean," Lisa murmured.

"No. He'll be okay. We're going to make sure he's okay."

"Of course we are," Lisa said and leaned against Sam's chest. "Come on, Sam. There's no sense in worrying about him while he's not even here. I think reruns of Lost are on."

Dean had started off at a steady sprint but quickly resumed a slow jog when he realized he didn't even want to run. He just wanted to fall asleep and wake up and have everything be better. Every problem just disappear. So much so, in fact, that Dean turned around not long after he started to return home and do just that when out of nowhere, thin air as far as Dean could tell, Cas appeared on the sidewalk not even one hundred feet in front of him. Dean jolted to a stop and considered slapping Cas in the face, the only problem was Dean didn't know quite what for.

"Cas," Dean finally said when he was about five feet away. And he remained there. He had no desire to be near Cas.

"Dean, I don't know what to say."

"How about you tell me what just happened? I heard my voice, Cas. My fucking voice. How is that even possible? And what the hell are you even here for?"

"Dean..."  
"You know what, no. I don't even want to know. Just leave me alone. Don't ever come back."

"Dean, please let me explain. Please."

"Fine."

"And please don't interrupt. Let me finish first. You were right. That was you, in a sense."

"What does that even mean?" Dean blurted.

"Dean, please. I'm not saying you owe me this much but give me a chance to explain. Everyone has the right to do that.

"That was you. This might sound crazy, but I have the capability of traveling between different alternative universes and interact with the people there. Your life is in this universe and my life is actually in a different world where I'm an angel. The other Dean has been spending his entire life hunting supernatural creatures and demons and I've been helping him because he saved me. It's been a couple of years now that I've known Dean, and he isn't so much different from you. But, in my world I've screwed everything up a couple of times to many people, but you too. I wanted to come to a world where I hadn't screwed anything up, which is kind of not the case anymore, and be happy because the shit I have to deal with back where I'm from is not the life of a celebrity by any means.

"And I fell in love with you, Dean. But you are simply my best friend where I come from and it never can be anything more. I wanted a chance with you and this was the only way I could think of. Call it selfish, and maybe it is, but it was beginning to feel like I couldn't live without you. I couldn't survive."

"You're insane," Dean responded. "I believe everything for god knows what reason, but I can't believe you're using me as an escape. As some way to make you feel better about yourself. Maybe that's just you. Maybe you're just the type to ruin everything and you should accept that. And the fact that you're already in love with me or whatever, that's creepy as fuck Cas. That's scary."

"Dean..."

Dean couldn't keep control. The immense mass of emotion that had been threatening to overtake him all day flooded out and Dean screamed and his body shook as wracking, tearless sobs hurled out of him. "I'm scared, Cas," Dean hiccuped.

Cas approached Dean cautiously and gave him a nervous hug that only included contact from his arms. Dean leaned into his shoulder to stifle the screams of rage still escaping occasionally and Cas held Dean for an immeasurable moment in time.

It's a fact that if a hug lasts over twenty seconds your trust for that person grows, and Dean, against every fiber in his body, felt himself relaxing and melting into Cas' embrace. Dean felt it could be interpreted that everything was okay, but it wasn't. He was still angry and confused. At least that was until Cas tipped his face so that his lips were inches from Dean's ear and whispered, "I'm scared too Dean. Do you think I know how to handle something like this?"

Dean shrugged Cas off and kept his focus on the ground. Dean was not prone to weakness or even susceptible to it in someone else and so he eventually managed to harden his gaze before meeting Cas' eyes. "I can't Cas. You fucked up." And Dean shoved past Cas, hitting him in the shoulder and sauntered back to the house, somehow managing to not look back. But if he had, Cas wouldn't have been there anyways. He'd gone to heaven in hope for some solitude and a chance to think on what he had done and how he could fix it. How he could recompense and let Dean forgive. His Dean. He may love both, but the Dean he met in the supermarket was his, and he was Dean's. If only Dean would accept him.

Dean huffed down the street, incapable of imagining what would go down when he entered the house. If he got one sympathetic stare, or one out of place question he would snap. The amount of emotion that had coursed through his veins today was enough to fill a garbage truck if siphoned out, and Dean had never let those emotions be felt like he had today.

When he walked in, Sam and Lisa were watching t.v. Dean got past, thankfully, by just saying he was back and that his walk had been nice, before he collapsed on his bed and punched his headboard. He was angry at himself. What Cas had gotten away with should've been unforgivable but Dean kept hoping that something Cas did would erase every single memory of the past and bring a clean slate. One where he could love the man he somehow felt he was destined to love. Unfortunately, destiny didn't always pan out because there was such a thing as choices and Cas had made the wrong one.

Dean's light was off and his eyes were closed when he heard a buzz from his phone. He glanced over to see that he had missed a call and had a message. He already knew who it was from but he couldn't resist hearing Cas' voice one last time, because as far as he was concerned Cas wasn't going to be a part of it for a good long while.

_Dean. You probably shouldn't be listening to this if you are, but if you are I'm glad. I should've told you what was going on from the beginning, but I just wanted a simple, straightforward, and caring relationship for once in my life. Can you blame me? I know I went about it in the wrong way and for that I'm sorry. I did screw up and just after I told you I'd do better. Unfortunately, that was me trying to do better. My people skills have always been subpar and I don't understand how certain actions affect people. You matter to me an insane amount Dean and I hope you can forgive me. I know I'm sorry isn't enough but I am sorry. I'm sorry for lying to you, for running into you on purpose in the supermarket, for lying again, for leaving you cassette tapes and pie that ever made you doubt me in the first place because it put you in a tough position, and I'm sorry most of all for ruining what we had. And don't deny it, Dean. I know we did. I sincerely hope you find your match in this world one day and that you're happy, because you don't know how much you deserve that Dean. Happiness. You deserve that more than anyone I've ever met._

A small tear ran down Dean's cheek when the message ended and he hugged his blankets close, wishing it was Cas instead, but not at the same time. He just needed time to sort out right from wrong and which emotions fit where but he was surprised to find himself forgiving Cas. Because Cas had said sorry, and sometimes those three words were the most underrated in the human language.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean went out to his garage in the morning and took a couple of hours to finish up a Chevy pick-up of an old man who looked like he spent a majority of his time watching old westerns and drinking scotch. Lisa brought him a sandwich and some water near lunchtime and Dean managed to choke it down despite the fact his stomach had the bad sort of butterflies and was massively uncomfortable. But he didn't want anyone to waste their time worrying about him.

Dean kept replaying the fight last night and coming up with every possible way it could have gone differently. But, unintentionally, all of his scenarios ended the same way. It all boiled down to a couple of choices. He could forgive Cas and have the potential to be happy for some period in time, he could never see Cas again, or he could compromise between the two; slowly work his way up to forgiveness and just let the pieces fall into place. He didn't know which one was best because he simply wasn't decisive enough at the moment.

"Hey Dean," Lisa shouted from the house at a fantastically high pitch. "Cas is here. Wanna come introduce us?"

He could hear protestations coming from Cas and frantic reassuring from Lisa and Sam. _Why did he even come here?_

"I'll be there in a sec," Dean yelled. He took four slow, counted deep breaths before pushing up to his feet and slipping quietly into the living room, peeking around into the entrance hall.

Cas was standing awkwardly in the center while Lisa and Sam were just smiling and staring, wringing their hands, fussing, not sure what they were supposed to say or do. Dean decided to save them all from the plethora of questions Lisa was about to throw at Cas and show himself.

"This is Cas. Cas this is Sam and Lisa," I said, gesturing to one and the other with my hand.

Cas shook both of their hands and gave Sam a friendly slap on the shoulder.

"I thought you didn't have people skills," I whispered bitterly.

"Was that wrong?" Cas questioned, seriously worried. "It's just what...what Sam would've done, if he was being introduced to someone."

"Oh, right. I suppose you would know my brother too."

"It doesn't look like your relationship is unicorns and butterflies," Lisa pouted, glancing between the two of them, observing their interaction.

"Can Cas and I talk privately for a moment?" Dean asked, his eyes not straying from Cas'.

"Sure," Sam said, tugging Lisa to the couch and the t.v.

"What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alright," Cas sighed, tilting his head to the left slightly.

"I'm fine," Dean growled.

"I know you are. But I couldn't help it. I was hoping in some way you were as unhappy, in your case hurt, as I am."

Dean, of course, was miserable and he couldn't believe Cas didn't catch in all the time he "knew" him that Dean frequently lied about his feelings. Then again, maybe other Dean shared his feelings with Cas with wild abandon and that was just what Cas was used to. That was when Dean chose the third tract on the yellow brick road. Cas had a trust in _him_ and that was worth rewarding in some small way.

"I lied. Of course I'm hurt. Do you think I'm a machine?" Dean mumbled.

"Oh," Cas said. "I should've known. You always lie to Sam about this sort of thing."

"I do, huh?"

"You're very protective of him. You wouldn't ever burden him with any unnecessary worrying. And you seem to consider yourself as unnecessary."

"Sounds like me," Dean paused, "What happens now?"

"I can't decide that for you."

"Alright, answer me one question."

"Anything."  
"How do you know I'm anything like your Dean? I just don't feel like it's us that have the connection and I'm just some sick substitute, which I'm not okay with. Not to be blunt, and I don't actually think I want to know the answer, but do you love _me_? Car fixer, jogger, occasional deer hunter me."

"You're not like Dean. You may have the same appearance, same personality, but I met you in a supermarket. You have a house, a steady income job, I wrote my phone number on your arm, and I left lemon meringue pie on your doorstep. One thing I've learned about earth is that it's all about the experiences. And through the experiences we've had you've separated yourself from the other Dean," Cas glanced down at his feet before he continued, "And I do. I think I love _you_. Not other Dean. You."

Dean bent down in an attempt to capture Cas' eyes. They kept flitting away until Dean asked Cas to look at him. "Say that again."

"I think I love you."

Dean couldn't return the comment but he felt his brain relaxing and his heart warming and picking up the pace. And now, he knew, it all depended on one thing. The remaining sliver of confusion.

"Kiss me."

Cas started and cautiously stepped toward Dean. He hadn't ever kissed Dean before, obviously, and everything he learned from the pizza man slipped his mind. He gently placed both of his hands on either side of Dean's face, who's heart was fluttering, and as he started to remember he pressed his lips to Dean's. Dean's mouth opened beneath his with not much encouragement and he flicked his tongue between Cas's teeth. That pulse ended with Dean against the wall. It became a battle until Dean pulled away, their breaths intermingling, and gazed into Cas' eyes. He sweetly and as gently as a bubble landing on a fingertip kissed Cas before nuzzling up into his neck.

"What now?" Cas breathed.

"I guess I'll allow you a five millionth chance."

"I believe it is only the third or fourth."

"It's called an exaggeration, Cas."

"Right."

Dean gripped Cas' shoulders to help himself off the wall and glanced over to see Sam and Lisa smiling, peering around the corner. Dean tugged off a shoe and gripped it tightly in his right hand.

"You two are freaks," he said, letting it fly. It hit Sam smack in the chest because Lisa had ducked and sprinted at both of them her arms wide open. She slammed into both of their bodies and hugged them as close as her short wingspan would allow.

"I don't know how to thank you, Cas. My brother is in a serious relationship! Eek!"

"How do you know?" Cas whispered in her ear, examining Dean for any signs that would give away his affection instead of the suggestion of a short lived fling.

"He's blushing. He's never blushed before. Look at the pink in his cheeks. It's adorable!" she said a little too loud. Dean glared, the color dissipating, and yelled, "I'm not adorable! You'd better go Cas," Dean said, turning to Cas.

"No," Lisa smiled, "You should stay. We were just about to watch Silver Linings Playbook. Dean won't watch it with us otherwise."

Cas straightened his shoulders and didn't consult Dean in an attempt at confidence and said, "I would like that very much. I think I shall."

"I'll make some popcorn," Dean sighed. "Make yourself comfortable Cas."

Lisa giggled, clapping her hands in excitement. All Dean could think about when he was walking into the kitchen was the immense heat and nervous fluttering of the kiss and how on earth it was possible that Lisa hadn't scared away Cas yet with her constant hovering and excitement that might even exceed his own.


	6. Chapter 6

Lisa and Sam crashed on the couch and Cas stood awkwardly beside them, wondering what the appropriate place was to sit. He didn't know how a human would behave in this situation but it almost had to be different then what he was doing right now. His heart was racing at the thought of spending an evening with Dean's family.

Cas was about to go into some sort of panic when Dean strolled back in to the living room with a bowl of popcorn and shot Cas a small smile. Every functioning body system in Cas relaxed substantially when that smile registered with him.

"Come sit down, Cas," Dean said, patting the seat beside him. Cas didn't know if he should sit inches from him or feet but he was sure it was the only remaining seat available, so Cas sat midway between inches and feet.

Sam hit play on the movie and Cas settled down into the couch and reached over to grab a handful of popcorn from Dean. Cas didn't need to eat, but it seemed polite since Dean had made it because…well he wasn't really sure why. Maybe he was just hungry. "This is a movie?" he whispered to Dean, motioning to the T.V.

"Yeah. Never seen one?"

Cas shook his head.

"Weird. I would think even kick-ass hunter Dean me would love watching movies."

"I believe he does. The amount of time Dean has for himself is minimal. I do not think he has seen a movie in quite some time."

"That sucks."

"Would you two shut up?" Sam hissed.

"Oh, sorry Sammy. You just missed the opening credits and some music. It's a crisis!" Dean shrieked sarcastically.

"Well I know Cas did and he might have enjoyed them since he's never seen them."

"Oh come on, nobody ever wants to watch the opening…"

"You should both shut up," Lisa demanded. "Now you're missing the movie. At least for Cas' sake."

"Oh please, do not feel the need to do anything for me."

Nobody said anything in reply so that they could hear the movie. It was the best way to tell Cas that he was their guest. Dean offered Cas some more popcorn and Cas shook his head, having decided he didn't appreciate the taste of popcorn enough to eat it. His body didn't need it which meant most of the time his body didn't like him eating. It would've had to have been really good.

"Not a popcorn guy?" Dean whispered.

"I could not tell you. But I don't eat. I do not need to."

"Wow. How do you even live? I can't even imagine not wanting to eat burgers and French fries."

"Of course you can't," Cas chuckled. They were shushed by Sam again, so Cas decided to actually watch his first ever movie. He was skeptical that it would even be good, but he wanted to have an open mind.

Throughout the movie Dean and Cas had managed to fidget enough that they ended up only inches apart on the couch. Dean was very aware that they were close to touching and felt sparks flying. It grew even worse when Tiffany and Pat started holding hands while walking around the ballroom. They were just as absentminded about their actions as he was. And they were just as odd as him and Cas were bound to be. In fact, they reminded Dean of his and Cas' relationship so far a lot. That didn't say good things about their sanity. Dean snuck his hand across his body and laid it down beside him on the couch so that his pink finger was touching Cas'. Cas felt the contact like Dean had slammed him against a wall, and he glanced down at their hands.

"It means I want you to hold my hand," Dean whispered into his ear. "How many dates have you been on?"

"Approximately zero."

"I have trouble understanding how you're alive. Do you enjoy your life?"

Cas paused. Nobody had ever asked him that and he had no idea what to say. He'd never thought about whether or not he enjoyed his life. All he knew was that it had a purpose. A purpose that was extremely important to him and it didn't matter whether or not he liked it. "No, I do not," Cas realized. "I feel as though I destroy everything and nobody appreciates what I try and do for them. And I gave up everything for him."

"We're talking about Dean aren't we?"

Cas nodded. "I am enjoying my life now, though."

"Well good. That's better than some people ever do." Dean smiled. Cas grinned back and entwined his fingers with Dean's, who didn't welcome it automatically but cautiously. Cas thought it was because he was still unsure, but Dean wanted to feel every little sensation of his fingers sliding across Cas'. At that moment Pat stated his memorized letter to Tiffany and Lisa clapped her hands in delight. "They're so cute," Lisa exclaimed.

When the credits rolled they all turned to Cas and asked what he thought. "It was good," Cas stated noncommittally.

"Did either of you actually watch the movie?" Lisa asked skeptically.

"No comment," Dean said. Lisa and Sam laughed and Lisa jumped on Dean's back and slowly spidered up his neck with her fingers before quickly reaching down, barely holding on with her legs, to Dean's stomach where she began tickling him. Dean didn't laugh but he couldn't keep a straight face either. He grinned and spun Lisa around to the front and tackled her onto the couch, followed by Sam on top of him and a massive tickle slash pillow fight ensued. Lisa was shrieking and both Dean and Sam were chortling deeply and loudly. Cas just stood watching his hands behind his back and a sad smile of someone who wanted to engage in a fun activity but didn't think he was welcome. Actually, he was just pretty sure he didn't want to be a part of that. It wasn't his sort of thing.

"Are you ticklish, Cas?" Lisa breathed, panting slightly when Dean and Sam finally let her up.

"No."

"Do you mind if I test that?"

"No." Cas set his stony face in place and tilted his head slightly in anticipation. Lisa was on him like a lion on an antelope and waggled her fingers back and forth endlessly in practically every part of his body. Cas had no trouble remaining serious except when she tickled the back of his neck. When she did, he collapsed to the floor and was rolling around in laughter. Dean watched in amazement, wishing he could hear Cas' laugh more often.

"Note that, Dean," Lisa yelled over Cas' howling. "That's leverage, that is."

"Get...off..." Cas said between gasping breaths. "Please."

Lisa tumbled off him and laid beside him on the carpet laughing as well. Dean knelt down and offered Cas a hand, helping him up.

"I must go, Dean."

"Sure, Cas. I'll walk you to the door."

"Bye Cas!" Sam and Lisa yelled to his retreating figure.

"They love you," Dean said.

"I did nothing, though. What do I deserve their love for?"

"Being with me and being brave enough to stay in the same room with all of us for more than an hour. That is a lot of work. We're always playing pranks or roughhousing or something."

"But that's normal."

"Not really. Maybe you should spend more time with other humans. You know, besides me."

"I have no need to."

"Whatever. I'll see you around then."

"Yes, of course."

"Good," Dean stated, before blushing slightly. He punched Cas lightly in the side and motioned to close the door, but Cas placed a hand on it, stifling the motion. "I forgot something," he whispered. He gently pressed his lips to Dean's and pulled away slightly so that all he could see were luminous green eyes. Dean brushed his lips over Cas' and smiled endearingly. "Get your feathered ass out of here."

"I swear, you two share a mind."

"Angels have wings right?" Dean asked in response.

"Yes. Other Dean has called me that before as well."

"Damn right. Good nickname. I'll check you later, Cas."

Cas nodded and watched the door shut. He remained there for quite a few minutes, not wanting to leave. Little did he know that Dean stayed right behind the door, leaning against the wall and wanting to run to wherever Cas was and ask him back for the night.

PLEASE REVIEW! I love hearing what you guys think. Plot ideas are good too, although I think I have an idea and I'm not sure you guys will like it...however many of you there are. 3


	7. Chapter 7

At two in the morning a day later Dean's phone pierced through the night shattering the little sleep Dean had been getting lately. He felt for his phone like a blind man and finally picked it up after ramming his fingers multiple times into the bedside table. Two of his fingers were throbbing but he had his phone which read Cas. He was calling. Dean pressed talk right away and eagerly put the phone against his ear.

"Cas, hey."

"You sound exhausted, Dean."

"It is two in the morning."

"Oh. Sorry. It is four in the afternoon here. I should have thought of that. I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine. What do you need?"

"I need to tell you something, I just do not know how to put it into words. I...I am worried you will be upset and I can't let you down. Not when I've already done so for everyone else."

"Stop the self-pity. Just tell me the truth, Cas. Then there's nothing I can blame you for. We can work out your problems together."

Dean heard Cas' breath crackle and break over the phone before Cas murmured quite softly, so Dean could hardly understand him, "Do you remember when I told you I was an angel? And how that was the reason I could see you at the same time as living my real life?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I lost my grace."

"What the fuck does that mean?" Dean said, anticipating a stark change in conversation coming up.

"I am human. As human as you. I cannot come see you."

"How are you calling me then?"

"The phone I own is special. As far as this world knows, it does not even exist. Nobody has ever seen it. Even if I was an angel, I wouldn't have been able to use this phone if it hadn't been able to distinguish between alternate universes."

"Okay. I'm not going to pretend to understand that. So you're never coming back?"

"I would say no because I want to say that to you more than anything but I can't promise, Dean. I have no idea what to do. I do not know where my grace could be, I am pretty sure Dean is unhappy with me not to mention I do not even know where he is, and I'm lost and confused. I..."

"Maybe I can help."

"How?"

"Can you define what a grace is for me?" Dean whispered, his brain running through a million unrealistic possibilities as to how he could get Cas back. None were even sort of doable. He was just trying to reassure Cas that everything would be okay but he was out of his league. As far as he could tell they were fucked. So fucked they might as well just move on.

"Um...of course. It is essentially an energy within angels that gives us our power and purity. Of course some would argue that hasn't ever been present in my grace but it makes us angels, really."

"Okay and how did you lose it? What's it look like? What does that even look like?"

"That is the problem, Dean. It is a white silver spirit that shines off it's own light but an angel named Metatron extracted it from me. I do not know if he kept it, it was used up in whatever spell he did, or it fell."

"What would it look like if it fell?"

"A shooting star, but there were hundreds of thousands that night. All the angels fell, you see."

"Wow. I don't know what to say. Call me back soon. I'll try and come up with something until then."

"What could there possibly be, Dean?"

"I don't know Cas. But I've found that sometimes it's the people who don't have all the information that come up with the best ideas because they don't see the blockades, they just see the loopholes."

"If you say so. Thank you, Dean."

"I have nothing better to be doing," Dean said, becoming increasingly aware of a dull ache in his heart. His body was just beginning to realize his, dare he say it, boyfriend might never be a part of his life again and it was reacting accordingly.

Cas strolled through the forest, watching the night sky as more of his family was toppling from the sky. A tear dribbled down his cheek and he really just wanted to sit down and sob for hours. Never move and just die here. But he had Dean. Both of them, that he had to get back to. He kept walking, hoping somewhere along the way he would recognize a tree, if that was possible, or a clearing that would lead him back to Dean and Sam. Or maybe the music blasting from the Impala or Crowley's screams. At least, Cas hoped something was going right that night. When Cas finally stumbled out of the woods he still didn't have any idea where he was, his neck was itching where Metatron had sliced it open, and he felt empty. If only he was still an angel. His phone rang and he answered it automatically, knowing it had to be Dean.

"Dean. That was quick."

"Actually it's been two hours. Your life must be miserable right now. So, I have some news. I just don't know whether it's good or bad."

"Any news would be helpful."

"I happen to know that Metatron kept your grace."

"You do?" Cas asked, "Are you sure? How did you come by that information."

"Well, no, I'm not sure. But some short, old, dweeby guy I'd never seen before appeared in the middle of my living room and handed me a vial with a silver glowy thing inside. And then left. He did say something about a sick joke and I should protect it. But he said it really sarcastically and I didn't understand what was going on so..."

"Shit."

"Do you say that often?" Dean laughed.

"No. I have never said that. It just struck me as the appropriate word. I would say it is likely you have my grace but that does not help us. In fact, it just makes the situation worse because now there is no way I can get it back."

"Couldn't you recruit some other angel to stop by and..."

"They all fell, Dean," Cas said monotonously.

"Right. So only Metatron could come by. And he won't I assume. Would the angel had to have been in heaven...is that the term?"

"Yes."

"Heaven to have fallen?"

"What are you suggesting?"

"Well what if there was an angel on earth. They can't very well fall can they? They could come get your grace from me and give it back to you."

"I will investigate that. That is not a terrible idea. I am impressed with your brainstorming skills, Dean."

"Yeah, well, figure it out quick. I already miss you. I think I need you man, so don't give up on me quite yet."

"I need you too, Dean. I will do everything in my power to get back to you."

"And Cas?"

"Yes Dean?"

"I'll pray for you."

"You have no idea what that means to me."  
"I think I do, man. I think I do. Call me with regular updates, kay? And don't do anything I wouldn't do."

He could hear a brief chuckle escape Cas before the phone went silent. Dean crashed onto his bed and stared absentmindedly on the ceiling. He wouldn't move for hours. Not until Lisa and Sam came in to ask what was wrong and ultimately join him. They didn't know the full circumstances but they got the general gist. Cas was in trouble.


	8. Chapter 8

Lisa was curled up against Dean's chest, her head resting on his chest and her gaze fixed on his face. Dean's eyes were focused intently on the ceiling while Sam was perched in a chair on the side of the room. They'd all been that way for quite some time and Sam was extremely worried because Dean never behaved like this, ever.

Almost as though Dean heard Sam's thoughts he jerked up, startling Lisa and sending her toppling to the floor, and stood. "I'm gonna go work on that pickup. You don't need to bring me any food or anything, Lis. I'm not hungry." And he walked out.

"What do we do?" Sam asked Lisa who had just managed to get up off the floor. She was amazed Dean hadn't even tried to help her up. He wasn't usually that inconsiderate.

"Who cares."

"Lisa, don't be angry, kay? He probably didn't even notice you were on the floor. In case you haven't been here for the last day, Dean's a little distracted."

"You're right. Sorry. He just hasn't ever been like this before and I don't like it."

"He has, you know."

"What?"

"Been like this before."

"When?" Lisa said.

"Do you remember last year when you ran away because you were absolutely pissed at Dean for getting rid of that boyfriend that we all agree now was the worst possible person in the world for you?"

"Yeah."

"He was so worried about you. I could tell. Maybe other people wouldn't have been able to, but he acted exactly like he's acting now. He's just worried about Cas to the extreme, which means he's in worse trouble then we could even dream up, Lisa. Give him a break."

"I didn't realize..." Lisa trailed off.

"It's all good. We just shouldn't disturb him. When Dean needs his alone time, he needs his alone time."

"Shouldn't we try, I don't know, save Cas?"

"Sure, if you're willing to try and get Dean to tell you what's going on. I for one wouldn't want to participate in that conversation and I can almost guarantee you he won't spout a word. But I wouldn't worry, Dean'll get it sorted out."

"How do you know?"

"That's just the kind of guy he is."

"When did you get to know Dean so much better than me?" Lisa laughed.

"Don't know. Maybe I just understand him better."

Dean was resting outside the door leading to the garage with his ear pressed firmly to the wood, eavesdropping on Lisa's and Sam's conversation. He knew they were upset with the way he was acting but he couldn't help it. Maybe he didn't know Cas all that well but he at least wanted to know Cas was going to be alright and the fact that he didn't had him worried sick. All he could think about was Cas' smile, voice, and the words uttered during their last phone call. He fingered the vial deep in his jean's pocket that held Cas' grace and dug it out bringing it close to his chest. The pickup he was supposed to be working on sat depressingly unfinished and Dean knew he wasn't going to find it in him to finish it today, which happened to be the deadline. A wanton tear fell from Dean's eye and he wiped it hurriedly away with the back of his hand before grabbing his phone and calling the owner of the pickup truck begging for an extra day. He ended up having to deduct a couple hundred dollars from the price tag but that was alright. He stood and made his way to his toolbox. The least he could do was close that up, but on the way he slipped on something, though he couldn't find the culprit, and fell hard on his ass. And right above him appeared an man with a huge grin on his face.

"You should see your face right now. Priceless."

"Who are you?" Dean growled.

"You're the exact same, aren't you? I was hoping you'd be just a little bit different but then I suppose are little Cassie wouldn't have fallen for you."

"You're an angel," Dean deduced. When he realized what this meant, Dean scrambled to his feet only to fall back down because his shoelaces were tied together. The angel was thrown into hysterics and Dean glared furiously up at him. "If you're done pulling pointless pranks, I need you to take this to Cas," he said, holding up the vial. "You haven't fallen and you aren't that creepy short dude."

"Pranks are never pointless, my friend. And how do you know I'm any better than Metatron? Frankly, other Dean is a hell of a lot smarter."

"He grew up differently."

"That he did. Alright, you trustworthy speck on the map, I'll take the vial to Cas." And the angel stuck out his hand.

Dean pulled back slightly, sensing the power this man had over him, and stowed the vial away in his pocket once more. He wanted to stand but wasn't really willing to try that again. "Why?"

"He's my brother. And I've never liked conflict much."

"Don't you want something?"

"Your word that you'll treat my brother right."

"I will, but that doesn't seem like an angel request from what I've heard from Cas."

"Well, he probably hasn't talked about me much. I'm Gabriel, and my brother thinks I'm dead. All the angels do, actually. I've just been chilling down in Belize with some ladies and margaritas."

"So why are you even here, then?"

"Let's just say I heard what happened and had a strange desire to take Metatron down. And when some of my friends and other brothers mentioned that Cas had been taking some trips lately I found at where and came to investigate. Practically the first thing I saw was you, and I knew. I wasn't sure you'd be able to help but it was worth a shot and look, you can!"

"Fine," Dean sighed and felt in his pocket to retrieve Cas' grace. But it was gone. Dean frantically switched to the other pocket to search and then the ground only to notice it precariously placed under Gabriel's foot.

"You should take better care of that."

Dean looked murderous and Gabriel chuckled lightly. "Alright, alright, I'm sorry. I'm out of here. You'll have your little nerd angel back soon."

"Nerd angel?"

"Haven't called him that yet, eh? Dean has a fondness for that nickname back at home."

"Hey, Gabriel," Dean managed to choke out, "Thank you."

"You're already making me reconsider. Just keep your mouth shut, Dean. I'll probably never see you again but I hate goodbyes so I'll see you around." Then Gabriel disappeared in a large puff of smoke emitting tiny fireworks. Dean laughed at his final punch line, ecstatic that he was about to get Cas back, and pleased to understand that joke. Angels just disappeared and reappeared. The puff of smoke had been for the hell of it.

Dean shut his eyes, willing every single thought away so that his mind was simple silence. He then traveled beneath the pickup and set to work, singing a Led Zeppelin song. When he slid back out to get a different tool he noticed to black shoed feet standing not ten feet away. Dean shot up to see Cas' worn face and ruffled trench coat.

"Cas," he beamed, and strolled over and pulled him into a stifling hug. Cas rested his head on Dean's shoulder and rubbed methodical circles on Dean's back. Dean didn't look it, but Cas knew he'd been extremely tense only minutes before. He could feel Dean melting into him before pulling away. He couldn't remember a hug with any Dean lasting longer then ten seconds. I think they just felt it got awkward.

"How are you doing, man?"

"I am fine, Dean. And you?"

"Good. I'm glad to see you."

"And I you." Cas reached up, curled his arm around behind Dean's neck and ran his fingers through Dean's hair on the back of his neck, tugging and twisting. Dean's eyes captured Cas' and he slowly bent down, pausing inches from Cas' lips, asking permission. Cas brought his lips against Dean's gently and smiled at the contact, the warmth. He was home.


End file.
